A Clear Mind

I woke up today with a gift: a clear mind.  It's been a whole week that I've felt like I'm walking back and forth in murky water - not only was it difficult to do the simplest things, but I couldn't see anything around me.  I told Joe this morning, "I don't know where I've been this week, but I'm here now."

Depression doesn't mean that I cry all the time - I didn't cry once this last week.  Nor does it mean I feel worthless or ugly - I don't.  This last week I felt nothing.  I had no emotions.  I didn't care about anything.

I moved and talked and breathed very slowly, like an old person.  I even drove slower than normal!  My reflexes were poor.  I continually dropped things and knocked things over, and even managed to scrape my face with my wedding ring (how does that happen?)

Joe and I met with a new psychiatrist and she is putting me on some new medication.

For now, I'm just reading my Bible (for the first time in a while) and enjoying the sunny morning and not feeling groggy but restful.

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